Alive and, well...

So while I was gone, I wanted to remain "unplugged"--only sending my boyfriend messages through an alternate email so he knew I was alive and well. I knew nothing about swine flu until about two days before I left when some Americans were talking about it. About maybe 1 in 10 people in the airport were wearing masks of some kind. While in the airport bathroom I watched as a prissy American attempted to make herself look hot while wearing a surgical mask, primping away. It made me smile with a "it'll nice to be home with these silly Americans by the end of the day" thought in my head, ready to go home.

I sat by my gate and fell asleep, only to be awoken by an obese man with a ponytail braid and an ace bandaged hand sitting next to me loudly describing to a 2 minute acquaintance how he fished some crazy huge marlin in Costa Rica. Then he goes on to talk about the other hunting he does--how he loves to go to Mexico and have a Mexican guy take a bird out of a cage and throw it in the air for him to shoot. How he spent $20k and is going down there to do it in 2 weeks. As the fog of my nap lifted I was about this close to asking him why the fuck he didn't grow a pair and at least try to actually hunt, that he wouldn't survive in nature because he was a lazy fat ass, and it was pitiful that he felt he should pay someone thousands of dollars to throw a defenseless animal into the air in front of his shotgun so he could enjoy killing something--chuckling about it as if it were something as recreational as beer pong.

So then I wasn't so excited about rejoining my people.