My friend the Jewess dragged me to Shopsin's yesterday. Shopsin's is a general store that is not a general store. It is a place to eat a big soup while getting heckled by the owner's teenage son. It is a blast.
I asked the big Shopsin what's in mire poix again. "I'm not telling you," he said. I pointed out the Eyeball Man figurine on the counter. "Not eyeballs-- BOOBS! What, you got two boobs, you can't tell a boob man when you see him?" Jr shouted at me. He insulted our dinner plans. "You're going to Little Italy to eat Italian food? You'll find better Chinese!" We ordered the Slutty Pancakes. "Who's the slutty one here?" he said, and slapped them down right in front of me.
At the end the Jewess wanted a picture. "No fucking pictures! I don't do that shit!" he said. "I been so nice to you this whole fucking time, now you want a picture too?"
So I took one of boob man.
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