i'm hot cuz i'm fly, you ain't cuz you're not

When you make a big deal about washing your work shirt separately because you prolifically ruined two already this month and your boss is pissed because no one in the history of the job has ever ruined that many so quickly but consent to wash it with other dirty clothes in order to save time, and forget about it, and two hours later hear your boyfriend emerging from the laundry room saying, "I'm not the one who left a pen in my pants," that is when you know you are fucked.