Sing woman already

My parents are upside down on their mortgage like a fat lady doing a fingerstand. I came home today to find my father in misery surrounded by a heap of bills.  

I watched as he called the mortgage company to inquire about reducing his monthly payment. He gave his name, the date of the last re-fi, his address, and then was silent. I asked him if he was on hold and if that was a good sign. "No," he answered, "She just needs a minute to finish laughing."